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Barrie, J. M. (James Matthew), 1860-1937

"The Admirable Crichton"

If any one disturbs this
row Crichton seems to know of it from afar and appears noiselessly
and replaces the wanderer. One thing unexpected in such a room is a
great array of tea things. Ernest spots them with a twinkle, and has
his epigram at once unsheathed. He dallies, however, before
delivering the thrust.
ERNEST. I perceive, from the tea cups, Crichton, that the great
function is to take place here.
CRICHTON (with a respectful sigh). Yes, sir.
ERNEST (chuckling heartlessly). The servants' hall coming up to have
tea in the drawing-room! (With terrible sarcasm.) No wonder you look
happy, Crichton.
CRICHTON (under the knife). No, sir.
ERNEST. Do you know, Crichton, I think that with an effort you might
look even happier. (CRICHTON smiles wanly.) You don't approve of his
lordship's compelling his servants to be his equals--once a month?
CRICHTON. It is not for me, sir, to disapprove of his lordship's
radical views.
ERNEST. Certainly not. And, after all, it is only once a month that
he is affable to you.


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