The alternatives do not interest them. The judge may know
what he is talking about, but they do not. The interesting question is
how much are they going to give the plaintiff.
The judge finally becomes worn out, a kind of self-hypnosis sets in.
He remembers so many phrases and legal maxims that he might enunciate,
his brain becomes confused as to selection. There are volumes of
charges to juries which he has more or less learned by heart. There
are so many glittering and vague generalities about the law of
negligence, the law of contracts, the law of evidence, the burden of
proof, or the weight of testimony, that he could go on indefinitely.
The jury have ceased to understand and the judge realizing the
hopelessness of this situation, winds up by saying--"So, gentlemen,
bearing in mind what I have just told you and the evidence in the
case, you will retire and consider your verdict."
The jury begin to gather their hats and coats, when up jumps one of
the lawyers and says: "One moment, please. I ask your Honor to charge
that if the jury find the cow that was in the plaintiff's garden was a
white cow and not a red cow, then their verdict must be for the
defendant." "I so charge," says the judge.
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